Sigh.....I have to take a deep breath before I write this one out.
I've been a stay at home mom now for going on 8 years. I won't say that I have loved or do love every minute of it. Because that would be a lie. There are moments (a lot) that I love and wouldn't trade for anything, and then there are the moments where I feel defeated, and like I don't know what I am doing. (yes, even after all of these years and all of these kids!)
I wonder if there is any age where you feel like you've just got it all together. Hmm....
For me with 4 kids, I know I have a lot more to learn and a lot of growing to do myself. I try to teach my children to respect others (especially adults), and to be kind to each other. To follow the rules, and to always tell the truth. I swear these things seemed so simple to teach before I had kids. HA!
I've spent these years with my kids doing all I can, all I know how, to teach these.....manners. It's not easy. I will just put that out there. I lay down at night (most nights) wondering if I could have taught my kids in a different way, or said something that would have stuck.
This all stems from last night with my beautiful daughter Laura. I will be honest.....mostly with myself. I have let this little girl slide with her attitude for far too long. My heart still sees her as my baby. She was my first. We tried for SO LONG to have her, and I cherish her (along with all of my children) every day. I don't want to be a mean mom, but I want my kids to have respect for me and their dad. That is important. I show respect to my children. They are human beings that deserve respect. They must also show it to others. Period.
Well, Laura was tired after her 6:30pm appointment (she normally is in bed at 7pm). We picked up her meds at walgreens and I let her pick out a new nail polish. She decided to ask for every single thing that her little blue eyes could possibly see. All you moms know just how frustrating that can be! I told her we were not there to shop, I was letting her get a nail polish as a treat from me. She wasn't happy with JUST a nail polish.
She decided to have attitude all the way through the store.....all the way through the parking lot, until she could plop her booty down in her car seat (trying to show as much attitude as possible). I knew right then and there that I needed to be more strict with her. She TRIED to embarrass me....but little does she know, I'm a mother of 4 that no longer can be embarrassed by her children. Been there done that....now it's my turn to embarrass ;)
Anyways, I told Laura that she would not have her nail polish until the next day for the nasty attitude that she chose to have. I had a big talk with her. She (being very tired) cried the entire time....TRYING to pull at my heart strings.
I swear this was like a light bulb moment for me. "Oh my gosh, she knows exactly what to do to make me stop lecturing her and feel bad". Not anymore. Mommy stuck to what I said. I felt bad....she was after all excited to get a nail polish, but these kids WILL show respect. It's just the rules.
Best part........ this morning as I am making her lunch, she walks up to me, hugs me tight and says "I'm sorry for acting rude last night mommy". YAY!!!!!!!!!!!! VICTORY FOR MOMMY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I felt wonderful. She learned! I told her "thank you for apologizing.....are we going to work on having a better attitude today?" and she followed with a "yes mom" :)
My job here is done! (Ok....not really lol. I have many many more years and lessons to teach my children. Some they will love and some they will hate. My job isn't to worry about if they like all the lessons, my job is to teach them these lessons, and continue to support them and push them to be great people).
Pat on my back :)