Tuesday, November 20, 2012

"One of those days"

If you are a human being, you have had "one of those days". It's when things go wrong every chance they get, you seem to feel crummy all day, and the day is NEVER ENDING! BUT, if you have children, its different. Yes, we decided to have children, they are loved and we are happy that we have all these little blessings around us, but believe it or not, we get the "one of those days" too.

For me, these days are super hard. The kids seem to have lost their ears, yet can still hear each other when they are arguing. Nap time is never long on these days, and you are ALWAYS out of the little things that might make you feel better.....like coffee. If you are having one of those days, and don't have coffee, I will pray for you! ;)

When you are a parent, and having one of those days, you feel alone. Nobody understands. THAT is the hardest part. Especially if you are a stay at home parent.

I've had many many days that I felt jealous of Nick. That he got to be out of the house, that he got to socialize with people over the age of 5. Again, YES I chose this. Can't I have bad days too though? Which is an entire different post....but as parents, we need to stick together. Working or not, we have bad days, and shouldn't have to have a disclaimer for our feelings.

What I have found that works, is a movie. Seriously. I put a movie on for the kids, make some popcorn, and then I sit in the kitchen alone, with some coffee (unless I'm out, then I will enjoy a shot or two! JUST KIDDING!!!). Those few minutes that I have to think to myself and get myself together, are vital on bad days.

So to my friends and family going through a bad day....which since I have many many mommy friends, each day is a bad day for another mommy. I'm sending you hugs. Take a breath, remember that bed time ALWAYS comes, and you are SO important in this world. :)


Sunday, November 18, 2012

Happy 8 year Anniversary!!

I'm writing this a day early, but with my busy life, I am not sure if I will have time to write this tomorrow. :)

Happy Anniversary hunny. I am so proud of our marriage. 8 years now!! We have gone through so much together, and I feel as though we have only grown closer with each passing year. We've made beautiful memories, that I will cherish forever.
When I first met you I knew I needed to know you. I was drawn to you, and I still am to this day. I still get butterflies when I see my phone say your name, I still get antsy when I see the clock getting closer to the time you will get home from school.
You've been an incredible husband to me. You've held my hand through some of my most awful experiences. You've stood by my side when I wasn't a very nice person, and you've kissed my lips when I needed it the most. You've given me a shoulder to lean on, cry on, and cuddle with. You've held me up when I felt like I couldn't do it myself. You've pushed me forward and helped me learn so much about life. You've made me think optimistically when I felt so negative. You have changed my life for the better.
You've given me 4 beautiful children, that you are the most amazing daddy to. We have become such an amazing team, over these past 8 years.
Thank you for everything you do for our family. You never give up or become restless. Your love for life and our family is truly inspiring.
I feel blessed to have you by my side in this life of ours, and am proud to be your wife. I love you more and more with each Anniversary we share together. Happy 8 year Anniversary hunny. I'm excited to share many more :)

The day we got married :)

8 years later, and more in love than ever.......

Where did my baby go??

 As a stay at home mom, I am blessed to be here for each and every milestone, all the good times and bad.
 But sometimes' I'm not ready for the milestones my kids make. William is almost 100% potty trained. He is in underwear all day, even when we go out, and has no accidents. He only wears pullups to bed. I wasn't ready for this. I know this will sound completely crazy, but it makes me sad. I know, I know....how can a mother be sad about ditching the diapers?! I'm not sad about that part, I'm just sad that he's growing up so quickly.
 He's my last baby. It hurts sometimes to see him growing so quickly, and I feel as though its going faster with him, than it did with any of my other children.
 William is smart, and wants to be a big kid, just like his bog brother and big sisters. He was completely ready to ditch the diapers when he realized everyone else in the family, uses the potty.
 Mommy on the other hand, wanted to feel like she still has a baby....hence why he is still in the crib :) Something I can control for now....until he decides to climb out :/ He runs, and uses so many words now, he has a sense of humor that keeps us smiling, and simply wants to impress those that love him. He has just about no sign of being a baby anymore.
 As a matter of fact, the only thing that makes me feel as though he has some baby left in him, are the 20 minutes after every nap. Those 20 minutes, the only thing my boy wants, is his blanket, and for mama to rock him. That's it. He's used to it. I've been doing that since he was born and he still loves it :) I do too. Most days I need to be doing something during that time, but I've learned this past year to truly slow down. I enjoy those 20 minutes of sitting with him. I rock him, have quiet conversations with him......always asking "did you have a good nap?" and his response is always the same....a smile and a head nod. Too sleepy still to actually speak :)
 I think as you have more and more children, you learn to enjoy EVERY thing, more and more. You realize that the baby years are so short, and they wont always want to cuddle as much as NOW. You let them do the thing's that will take forever, because it won't always be this way. We wont get to have the opportunity to play cars on the living room floor, when he's 16. He won't want to play hide and seek, and giggle with delight when mommy just "can't find him anywhere", when he is in high school. He will want to do things more independently when he is older. That time happens so quickly. So I am enjoying the small things now. Making the memories, and writing them down so I don't forget them. That happens too...and I'm here to tell you, the more children you have, the more you forget things. I'm only 28 and I forget things that happened 5 years ago. My brain is just so full!
 So my friends....when you are getting frustrated that your baby won't sleep at night, kiss them and remind yourself....this won't last forever. I did that when I was up all night with my babies ;)
 When your child wants to take longer in the store because they want to help put EVERYTHING in the cart, remember that one day they wont want to go to the store with you....LOL, I know that is kind of a dream for us moms right now, but believe me.....you will still want them to tag along when they are older, with better things to do with their time. :) So, for now, while my kids are still kids, I am enjoying them. The good, the bad and the not so fun moments....they all will make memories that I will smile back on :)

Thursday, November 8, 2012

You didn't know??

I figured it was time for a fun post. I write so much about my personal life, and most of the time it is about mommy stuff, so I wanted to share some fun facts about myself.

* I hate avocado.Yes this means I hate guacamole.
* I will eat guacamole that is made by family and friends because I don't want to be rude.
*I had surgery on both of my eyes at the age of 4. They had to fix weak muscles in my eyes. I remember it.
*I also had surgery on my kidneys at age 5 I believe. I remember that too. My kindergarten teacher came to my house after I had surgery and she brought me lots of fun activities to do. I loved her! Oh, and when I was in recovery at the hospital it was Halloween and I had to miss out, so lots of famous people came around to the patients and gave out candy and toys. I also remember a tree catching on fire outside of my room. And something crazy....they had me so doped up on morphine after that surgery that I had hallucinations. I remember seeing monkeys in my face, and being so scared. My parents took care of it, and the nurses I'm sure got in trouble because they gave me too much!
*I cannot live without chocolate.
*My heart lives through music. I can relate to so many songs that I HAVE to hear them often. And yes, my kids have to listen to me belt em' out in the car. :)
*"You are my sunshine" is the first song I taught each one of my kids. But I sing it with their name in it. "You are my William, my only William" :)
*Nick and I will be married for 8 years this November.
*I have anxiety, that comes and goes when it pleases. I'm too scared to be on medicine for it....but I probably should be.
*I hate Halloween. I know, how could a mom hate it....:P I just hate how expensive costumes are and all the work, for a couple hours of walking kids that are dragging their costumes and making you hold masks, swords, and buckets!! My kids don't know this :)
*I want to adopt a baby when all of my children are older.....and out of the house lol.
*Every time I speak to/text my father, my anxiety creeps up.
*I did a modeling class when I was about 12. I liked it, but didn't feel like it was me at the time.
*I worry too much. About everything.
*I have had three kids, 3 epidurals and 1 messed up really really bad. It turned my world upside down while I was in pain, and for several months after.
*I love fried eggs on white toast. It must be white....it's just not the same with wheat.
*Sometimes I forget I have my tubes tied.
*I hate scary movies. I don't even let Nick tell me about scary movies he's seen.
*I pray and give thanks every night. I cannot imagine going to sleep without praying. I don't consider myself religious.....but I started praying to God when I had a really hard time getting pregnant with Laura.
*I used to play Halo with Nick, my brother and some friends for hours and hours every night. It was so much fun. We then had Laura, then Katie and my life became too busy and tiring to stay up so late!
*I am not a night person.
*When my alarm goes off in the morning, I get up right away, and it drives me nuts that Nick pushes the snooze on his. lol. ;)
*I put too much pressure on myself.
*I was born in Germany.
*My favorite meal to make is Chilli. It's my moms recipe and it makes me feel like I'm back at home.
*When we moved to Redding, I had a really hard time for a while. It was a lot of change and I missed (still do!!) my family so much.
*I won't let Laura walk home from the bus stop. I am not sure when or if I ever will. Yes, I'm a helicopter parent. I'm not afraid to admit that I'm terrified of her (and all of my kids)being taken.
*I judge mothers who let their children walk around the store with only a diaper. I know its not right....but it's the truth.
*I spend my life being the best mom and wife I can be. I longed for so long to be a mom. I will do everything I can to raise happy, healthy, smart and caring children. BUT it's sometimes overwhelming, and extremely stressful!!!!
*I will not let my kids have a facebook or any type of social network page. It's not worth it.
*I love coffee, and collect coffee mugs.
*Fall is my favorite season.
* I love to bake. My thighs do not like this. ;)
*I hate texting. I do it.....but I HATE it. I hate hearing my phone go off.
*My favorite restaurant is in Arizona. Macayos. YUM!!
*I love reading, and wish I had more time to myself to read more.
*I miss being pregnant all the time. I LOVE having a baby in my belly, and feeling all those kicks. There is nothing like it!
*Sometimes I shop online. I put lots of different things that I love in my shopping cart and then right before I go to bed at night, I remove them all from my cart. LOL!
*I can see fakeness in people, very quickly.
*When I was pregnant with Laura, I listened to Celine Dione all the time.
*When I'm at home, I like to wear my big comfy robe over my clothes. Over pj's or my daily outfits. It's cozy.
*I love buying new candles.
*I have a soft spot in my heart for baby socks.
*When I was pregnant with William I was addicted to buying baby blankets. I already had plenty!!!
*I love wearing cute necklaces, earrings, and bracelets, but I can't wear any other rings, besides my wedding ring.
*I'm terrified of bee's.
* I have to have the fan on, and have a big blanket over me to sleep.
*I LOVE MAKEUP. And in high school was teased that I wore too much makeup. It really hurt my feelings, and sometimes to this day I will ask Nick "am I wearing too much makeup?"
*One of my most favorite things to do, is to get my hair done. I love it.
*I am obsessed with bean dip.
*Christmas is my favorite holiday. I LOVE finding fun things for the kids, filling the stockings, listening to Christmas music, drinking lots of hot chocolate, and watching the kids open gifts early in the morning.
*I listen to Christmas music as soon as November hits and don't stop until far after Christmas has past....around Feruary lol!
*I feel like people stare at me when we go out to eat. I can't be the only one that feels like that, but I really hate it.
* I have a set of grandparents that have never called, emailed, or written to see how their great grandchildren are doing.
*I hate buying jeans. Woman's worst nightmare lol!
*I wear glasses a lot of the time that I'm at home....but when I am out, I usually leave them at home. It became a habit in high school.
* I HATE watching anyone brush their teeth.
*Most mornings I have coffee for breakfast.
*I have used the same brand of foundation (makeup) for about 5 years now. I love it and would cry if they stopped making it! (Revlon colorstay)
*I love watching makeup and hairstyle tutorials on youtube.

So there are some fun facts about me. :) I am sure I will be jotting down more here and there. I swear you can learn a lot about yourself when you write down facts.