Saturday, June 29, 2013

A screaming toddler, and my heavy heart.

Good morning everyone. Ahh, it's finally the day we have waited for....SATURDAY! I love this day particularly because it's the only day I get to sleep in! Nick gets Sundays :)

I woke up to my children playing in the backyard, and William screaming in the back yard. This has officially become a problem in my home. He screams all to often, and I think my ears are about to leap off my head, and run for the hills.....or maybe I will?!

I've raised 3 other toddlers at this point. I've gone through the screaming phase with Laura (timeout worked like a charm for her)....Nicholas and Katie never did this scream fest stuff. William seems like an entirely different breed! He gets to the highest of high pitched scream, that it literally shocks my brain, and makes me paralyzed for a minute.

What do I do?

I'm a mom of four, who cannot for the life of me figure this one out! I've done it all!!! I've ignored it.....while my anger builds up in my chest because he simply wont give up. I've put him in time out. I've talked to him softly about why it hurts our ears, and that our voice is for singing and speaking nicely. I've even resorted to spanking....which, most of you know, I'm on the fence about. I was spanked as a child but in my honest opinion, THAT was not spanking, that was crossing the line. I didn't feel respect for my father because of this, I felt fear and that is something I don't want to instill in my kids. There HAS to be a better way right?! Well help me find it because I've done all the nice, pretty routes with William, and his screaming is only getting worse.

So I spanked him yesterday. Sigh....I can't believe I just typed that. It hurts my stomach. Now don't get me wrong, I am probably not even spanking the right way? Who knows. I simple walked up to him and swatted his booty once......but it still makes me feel like I did something to betray his trust in me.

This makes me a little upset though. I've tried it all and yet the screaming continues in all it's awful glory, and so I resort to the only thing left....a swat. It certainly got his attention, but why am I the only one left stewing over it? Shouldn't he be? Oh yes, he's only 2 and a half......he can't think past 10 second intervals. ;)

This is my thing....I won't judge other people when they spank, do what you need to do. Some kids probably NEED that type of response from their parent to get it to click in their brains. I don't know. I certainly judge myself though. I try my hardest to be a calm, sensitive, understanding mother, and now I feel like all of that just came crumbling down around my feet.

I will say, he didn't scream at me......until 30 minutes later when he found something else to be upset about. I didn't spank him again though, because I feel like it's too much, but then I go back in my mind, with that awful screech running through my body.....and wonder if maybe that's what THIS child needs. A swat each time he screams at all of us.

I'd honestly love to hear your insight. Did I just ruin my mommy status? Do I need to turn in my mommy badge? Sigh.....Lord please make this child either stop screaming, or maybe lose his voice long enough for me to regain my hearing.


Disclaimer: No children were hurt before, during or after this blog was written. A swat won't ruin a child. It will just make my heart heavy. :(

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