Monday, July 29, 2013

I don't want to let go!

My kids have about 3 and a half weeks until school starts....when I say that I feel a few different things. SUPER excited....what mom isn't excited for school to start? These kids seem to find the weirdest things to fight about, when they are around each other ALL day. Them having a break from each other will be good, for all of us!

I feel stressed about the rest of the school stuff the kids need....backpacks, a few more outfits for the girls, lunch boxes, all three kids still need school supplies. I'm buying for an 8th grader, which we all know means A LOT of supplies. AHH!!

I also can't help but feel scared. My son will be in 8th grade. He will be part of the "big kids" in school now, and that can be a good or bad thing. ;) I worry that Laura won't mesh well with the teacher I chose for her, or kids won't be nice to her. I worry that Katie might not do well in all day kindergarten.....after all, she is only 4. She turns 5 at the end of September, and even though she is an independent little firecracker.....she still requires a lot of quiet time, playing alone. She thrives off of it.

Which leads me to feel sad. I love my kids being home. I know where they are. I know they are safe, and happy, I know random kids aren't being mean to them. I know they are eating their lunch, and if they need me at any given notice....I'm here.

I worry a lot, about each of my kids. It's what I do.

I hate to let go. With each milestone they reach, it makes it that much harder for me. I feel like soon they will be moving out and leading their own lives. I'm SO not ready for that.....even on a bad day. ;)

My kids are my life. Period. They are my heart, and knowing they are going to be away from me for several hours a day, absolutely makes me sad. Don't get me wrong....we all need those breaks.....but going from them being home allllll summer, to going to school all day, will be something I have to get used to again.

HA, you probably wouldn't believe that I've been doing this since my 13 year old was 5! I feel worried and anxious, excited and sad each and every year that they start school.

This will be the last year that William is home with me all day. He will start preschool the following year.....what will I do then?! I'm going to be a basket case.....though my home will be very clean! ;)

I know I can't be alone in feeling these to all of you mama's out there that look forward to, yet dread the first day of school....I'm sending you all a big hug!


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